The Year of Enough Day 6: Christine Hassler on the Need to be “Somebody” (and how to let go of it)

on January 8, 2014 | in Life in General, Relationships | by

Barbie posing
“What I am is good enough if I would only be it openly.” – Carl Rogers

All throughout junior high and high school and college, I desperately wanted one thing.

I wanted to be “somebody”: The cool kid, the popular girl, the one who everyone wanted to be around and who got invited to all the parties. I wanted to be the one who all the guys wanted and all the girls wanted to be.

Have you ever felt the need to be “somebody,” too? To prove yourself in some way by overachieving at work or in school, by being the funniest person in the room, and so on and so forth?

Beneath this need to prove is the often unacknowledged and heartbreakingly painful belief that who we are, just as we are, is not enough. We must live up to a certain expectation in order to be lovable.

But listen here, Awesome Sauce: The unshakable truth is that each of us is “inherently enough, and worthy, and valuable, just for who we are. Not for anything that we do,” says today’s wonderful “Year of Enough” guest, Christine Hassler, who is a life coach, a professional speaker, a generation Y export and the author of two books, 20 Something, 20 Something, 20 Everything and The 20 Something Manifesto.

“I always had this sort of thing about being ‘somebody,'” says Christine. “because I wanted that approval and validation, and I thought that I’d feel better about myself if I knew other people valued me.”

After leaving her successful job as a Hollywood agent at 25 to pursue work she could be passionate about, the rest of Christine’s life fell apart, too: Her engagement unexpectedly ended, she was diagnosed with an autoimmune disorder, and she found herself in tens of thousands of dollars of debt.

In her interview today, Christine shares the insights that helped her get through these difficult times and come out stronger, happier and healthier on the other side, with a firm belief in her own inherent worthiness.

Check out Christine’s interview to learn:

  • The story of Christine’s personal journey, from living for external validation and accolades, to coming to embrace her own inherent value.
  • How to identify and be aware of the “compensatory strategies” we tend to lean on when we feel that we aren’t enough on some level — for some people, it involves being an overachiever. For others, it’s being a people pleaser, a performer, or a perfectionist.
  • How to deal with “expectation hangover” — i.e., when your career,relationship, or life in general is NOT working out as planned.
  • Tips for rewiring your brain and changing your patterned thoughts of negativity and inadequacy to ones of love and positivity.
  • The paramount importance of the most important relationship in your life: The one you hold with yourself.
  • Why the best way to create abundance in your life is to recognize and appreciate the “enough-ness” you already have.

Listen to a preview of Christine’s interview below — and if you want access to the full interview, as well as today’s daily challenge, you can gain access right here.

Again — sign up to access the full interview here, which streams for free today only.

See you tomorrow for the next interview and challenge! Hope your new year is off to a great start!

With lots of love for who you are — exactly as you are,

xoxo Therese

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[Image by  lil’_wiz]

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